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1	LOOSE CHANGE Andrea Levy First published in ‘ The Independent on Sunday ’
2	I AM NOT IN THE HABIT of making friends of strangers .
3	I 'm a Londoner .
4	Not even little grey - haired old ladies passing comment on the weather can shame a response from me .
5	I 'm a Londoner - aloof sweats from my pores .
6	But I was in a bit of a predicament ; my period was two days early and I was caught unprepared .
7	I 'd just gone into the National Portrait Gallery to get out of the cold .
8	It had begun to feel , as I 'd walked through the bleak streets , like acid was being thrown at my exposed skin .
9	My fingers were numb , searching in my purse for change for the tampon machine ; I barely felt the pull of the zip .
10	But I did n't have any coins .
11	I was forced to ask in a loud voice in this small lavatory , ‘ Has anyone got three twenty - pence pieces ? ’
12	Everyone seemed to leave the place at once - all of them Londoners I was sure of it .
13	Only she was left - fixing her hair in the mirror .
14	‘ Do you have change ? ’
15	She turned round slowly as I held out a ten - pound note .
16	She had the most spectacular eyebrows .
17	I could see the lines of black hair , like magnetised iron filings , tumbling across her eyes and almost joining above her nose .
18	I must have been staring to recall them so clearly .
19	She had wide black eyes and a round face with such a solid jaw line that she looked to have taken a gentle whack from Tom and Jerry 's cartoon frying pan .
20	She dug into the pocket of her jacket and pulled out a bulging handful of money .
21	It was coppers mostly .
22	Some of it tinkled on to the floor .
23	But she had change : too much - I did n't want a bag full of the stuff myself .
24	‘ Have you a five - pound note as well ? ’ I asked .
25	She dropped the coins on to the basin area , spreading them out into the soapy puddles of water that were lying there .
26	Then she said , ‘ You look ? ’
27	She had an accent but I could n't tell then where it was from ; I thought maybe Spain .
28	‘ Is this all you 've got ? ’ I asked .
29	She nodded .
30	‘ Well , look , let me just take this now ... ’
31	I picked three damp coins out of the pile .
32	‘ Then I 'll get some change in the shop and pay them back to you . ’
33	Her gaze was as keen as a cat with string .
34	‘ Do you understand ?
35	Only I do n't want all those coins . ’
36	‘ Yes , ’ she said softly .
37	I was grateful .
38	I took the money .
39	But when I emerged from the cubicle the girl and her handful of change were gone .
40	I found her again staring at the portrait of Darcy Bussell .
41	Her head was inclining from one side to the other as if the painting were a dress she might soon try on for size .
42	I approached her about the money but she just said , ‘ This is good picture . ’
43	Was it my explanation left dangling or the fact that she liked the dreadful painting that caused my mouth to gape ?
44	‘ Really , you like it ? ’ I said .
45	‘ She does n't look real .
46	It looks like ...
47	’ Her eyelids fluttered sleepily as she searched for the right word , ‘ a dream . ’
48	That particular picture always reminded me of the doodles girls drew in their rough books at school .
49	‘ You do n't like ? ’ she asked .
50	I shrugged .
51	‘ You show me one you like , ’ she said .
52	As I mentioned before , I 'm not in the habit of making friends of strangers , but there was something about this girl .
53	Her eyes were encircled with dark shadows so that even when she smiled - introducing herself cheerfully as Laylor - they remained as mournful as a glum kid at a party .
54	I took this fraternisation as defeat but I had to introduce her to a better portrait .
55	Alan Bennett with his mysterious little brown bag did n't impress her at all .
56	She preferred the photograph of Beckham .
57	Germaine Greer made her top lip curl and as for A. S. Byatt , she laughed out loud , ‘ This is child make this ? ’
58	We were almost making a scene .
59	Laylor could n't keep her voice down and people were beginning to watch us .
60	I wanted to be released from my obligation .
61	‘ Look , let me buy us both a cup of tea , ’ I said .
62	‘ Then I can give you back your money . ’
63	She brought out her handful of change again as we sat down at a table - eagerly passing it across to me to take some for the tea .
64	‘ No , I 'll get this , ’ I said .
65	Her money jangled like a win on a slot machine as she tipped it back into her pocket .
66	When I got back with the tea , I pushed over the twenty - pences I owed her .
67	She began playing with them on the tabletop - pushing one around the other two in a figure of eight .
68	Suddenly she leant towards me as if there were a conspiracy between us and said , ‘ I like art . ’
69	With that announcement a light briefly came on in those dull eyes to reveal that she was no more than eighteen .
70	A student perhaps .
71	‘ Where are you from ? ’ I asked .
72	‘ Uzbekistan , ’ she said .
73	Was that the Balkans ?
74	I was n't sure .
75	‘ Where is that ? ’
76	She licked her finger , then with great concentration drew an outline on to the tabletop .
77	‘ This is Uzbekistan , ’ she said .
78	She licked her finger again to carefully plop a wet dot on to the map saying , ‘ And I come from here - Tashkent .
79	‘ And where is all this ? ’ I said , indicating the area around the little map with its slowly evaporating borders and town .
80	She screwed up her face as if to say nowhere .
81	‘ Are you on holiday ? ’ I asked .
82	She nodded .
83	‘ How long are you here for ? ’
84	Leaning her elbows on the table she took a sip of her tea .
85	‘ Ehh , it is bitter ! ’ she shouted .
86	‘ Put some sugar in it , ’ I said , pushing the sugar sachets toward her .
87	She was reluctant , ‘ Is for free ? ’ she asked .
88	‘ Yes , take one . ’
89	The sugar spilled as she clumsily opened the packet .
90	I laughed it off but she , with the focus of a prayer , put her cup up to the edge of the table and swept the sugar into it with the side of her hand .
91	The rest of the detritus that was on the tabletop fell into the tea as well .
92	Some crumbs , a tiny scrap of paper and a curly black hair floated on the surface of her drink .
93	I felt sick as she put the cup back to her mouth .
94	‘ Pour that one away , I 'll get you another one . ’
95	Just as I said that a young boy arrived at our table and stood , legs astride , before her .
96	He pushed down the hood on his padded coat .
97	His head was curious - flat as a cardboard cut - out - with hair stuck to his sweaty forehead in black curlicues .
98	And his face was as doggedly determined as two fists raised .
99	They began talking in whatever language it was they spoke .
100	Laylor 's tone pleading - the boy 's aggrieved .
101	Laylor took the money from her pocket and held it up to him .
102	She slapped his hand away when he tried to wrest all the coins from her palm .
103	Then , as abruptly as he had appeared , he left .
104	Laylor called something after him .
105	Everyone turned to stare at her , except the boy , who just carried on .
106	‘ Who was that ? ’
107	With the teacup resting on her lip , she said , ‘ My brother .
108	He want to know where we sleep tonight . ’
109	‘ Oh , yes , where 's that ? ’
110	I was rummaging through the contents of my bag for a tissue , so it was casually asked .
111	‘ It 's square we have slept before . ’
112	‘ Which hotel is it ? ’
113	I thought of the Russell Hotel , that was on a square with uniformed attendants , bed turning - down facilities , old - world style .
114	She was picking the curly black hair off her tongue when she said , ‘ No hotel , just the square . ’
115	It was then I began to notice things I had not seen before : dirt under each of her chipped fingernails , the collar of her blouse crumpled and unironed , a tiny cut on her cheek , a fringe that looked to have been cut with blunt nail - clippers .
116	I found a tissue and used it to wipe my sweating palms .
117	‘ How do you mean just in the square ? ’
118	‘ We sleep out in the square , ’ she said .
119	It was so simple she spread her hands to suggest the lie of her bed .
120	She nodded .
121	‘ Tonight ? ’
122	The memory of the bitter cold still tingled at my fingertips as I said , ‘ Why ? ’
123	It took her no more than two breaths to tell me the story .
124	She and her brother had had to leave their country , Uzbekistan , when their parents , who were journalists , were arrested .
125	It was arranged very quickly - friends of their parents acquired passports for them and put them on to a plane .
126	They had been in England for three days but they knew no one here .
127	This country was just a safe place .
128	Now all the money they had could be lifted in the palm of a hand to a stranger in a toilet .
129	So they were sleeping rough - in the shelter of a square , covered in blankets , on top of some cardboard .
130	At the next table a woman was complaining loudly that there was too much froth on her coffee .
131	Her companion was relating the miserable tale of her daughter 's attempt to get into publishing .
132	What did they think about the strange girl sitting opposite me ?
133	Nothing .
134	Only I knew what a menacing place Laylor 's world had become .
135	She 'd lost a tooth .
136	I noticed the ugly gap when she smiled at me saying , ‘ I love London . ’
137	She had sought me out - sifted me from the crowd .
138	This young woman was desperate for help .
139	She 'd even cunningly made me obliged to her .
140	‘ I have picture of Tower Bridge at home on wall although I have not seen yet . ’
141	But why me ?
142	I had my son to think of .
143	Why pick on a single mother with a young son ?
144	We have n't got the time .
145	Those two women at the next table , with their matching hand bags and shoes , they did nothing but lunch .
146	Why had n't she approached them instead ?
147	‘ From little girl , I always want to see it ... ’ she went on .
148	I did n't know anything about people in her situation .
149	Did n't they have to go somewhere ?
150	Croydon , was it ?
151	Could n't she have gone to the police ?
152	Or some charity ?
153	My life was hard enough without this stranger tramping through it .
154	She smelt of mildewed washing .
155	Imagine her dragging that awful stink into my kitchen . Cupping her filthy hands round my bone china . Smearing my white linen . Her big face with its pantomime eyebrows leering over my son . Slumping on to my sofa and kicking off her muddy boots as she yanked me down into her particular hell .
156	How would I ever get rid of her ?
157	‘ You know where is Tower Bridge ? ’
158	Perhaps there was something tender - hearted in my face .
159	When my grandma first came to England from the Caribbean she lived through days as lonely and cold as an open grave .
160	The story she told all her grandchildren was about the stranger who woke her while she was sleeping in a doorway and offered her a warm bed for the night .
161	It was this act of benevolence that kept my grandmother alive .
162	She was convinced of it .
163	Her Good Samaritan .
164	‘ Is something wrong ? ’ the girl asked .
165	Now my grandmother talks with passion about scrounging refugees ; those asylum seekers who ca n't even speak the language , storming the country and making it difficult for her and everyone else .
166	‘ Last week ... ’ she began , her voice quivering , ‘ I was in home . ’
167	This was embarrassing .
168	I could n't turn the other way , the girl was staring straight at me .
169	‘ This day , Friday , ’ she went on , ‘ I cooked fish for my mother and brother . ’
170	The whites of her eyes were becoming soft and pink ; she was going to cry .
171	‘ This day Friday I am here in London , ’ she said .
172	‘ And I worry I will not see my mother again . ’
173	Only a savage would turn away when it was merely kindness that was needed .
174	I resolved to help her .
175	I had three warm bedrooms , one of them empty .
176	I would make her dinner .
177	Fried chicken or maybe poached fish in wine .
178	I would run her a bath filled with bubbles .
179	Wrap her in thick towels heated on a rail .
180	I would then hunt out some warm clothes and after I had put my son to bed I would make her cocoa .
181	We would sit and talk .
182	I would let her tell me all that she had been through .
183	Wipe her tears and assure her that she was now safe .
184	I would phone a colleague from school and ask him for advice .
185	Then in the morning I would take Laylor to wherever she needed to go .
186	And before we said goodbye I would press my phone number into her hand .
187	All Laylor 's grandchildren would know my name .
188	Her nose was running with snot .
189	She pulled down the sleeve of her jacket to drag it across her face and said , ‘ I must find my brother . ’
190	I did n't have any more tissues .
191	I 'll get you something to wipe your nose , ’ I said .
192	I got up from the table .
193	She watched me , frowning ; the tiny hairs of her eyebrows locking together like Velcro .
194	I walked to the counter where serviettes were lying in a neat pile .
195	I picked up four .
196	Then standing straight I walked on .
197	Not back to Laylor but up the stairs to the exit .
198	I pushed through the revolving doors and threw myself into the cold .